Sunday, August 16

Family Man

Missy's post brings to mind something Don said many years ago. In our mid-thirties he told me he had no plans to have children of his own. He didn't really say why, but I think he had the same fear most men have of not being ready to take care of a family. The irony was that by his own undeniable nature - generous, loyal, dependable, self-sacrificing and empathetic - Don became the ultimate family man. He took care of everybody he loved. I know how loyal he was to his family and Missy because there were many times when he passed on social occasions because he wanted to spend the time with them alone. I know one of his most joyous traditions was the annual golfing tournament he would have with Doug, Paul, and Randy, with bragging rights going to the winner. I think he won quite a few times but didn't do much bragging. We all know Don gave much and took little. He was not the kind of guy to sit back with a beer and wait to be asked for help. He anticipated what needed to be done and did it before we knew we needed it. Bindu and I were married on this small island in the Bahamas and it was a logistical nightmare. Without adequate transportation for our wedding party we had to charter planes, taxis, ferries, sail and fishing boats and golf carts to get everybody around. We needed to bring cases of wine and champagne over from Florida to keep the party going for a week. Unfortunately Missy wasn't able to join Don, but he was there, always taking care of details in the background. He picked up the cases of wine in FL and took the crew out sailing when I was occupied with wedding preps, and fixed the cat when the engine went out (my brother Capt Jake gets credit here too). Don was an honored guest, encouraged to kick back, relax, and enjoy, but nobody could keep him from being helpful at all times. My family loved Don and always considered him an essential presence in our lives. From the posts here we can see that Don contributed greatly to all our lives and I'm sure his positive influence on Blake will last a lifetime. Being as modest as he was, I don't know if he admitted to himself how much of a treasure he was to his friends and family, but we will always know.
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2 comments:

  1. Jim SchausAugust 22, 2009 at 11:17 AM

    I just learned of Don's passing and felt very saddened but compelled to add a few comments to this amazing blog paying tribute to the great life of Don Deutz Seeth. I wanted to relay my first and last memories of Don, and a few bits in between. I was 7 and just moved into 201 Harvard St. and went across the street to meet the wild indians. I knocked on the door and Deutz appears in the high window of the door butt naked struggling to get free from the grasp of Randy and Paul. Don became a great buddy and I have him and the Seeth family to thank for many of my favorite childhood memories, quite different than the more sedate Schaus house. Trading baseball cards (Don Yankees, me Mets), the tree fort with apple fights and the sky ride from tree to tree, wiffle ball, B-ball and Don's between the legs dribble, catch-a-fly-or up, gnop-gnip matches, snow days at Wheatley Hills G.C. (Don going down suicide hill on his Snurfer, me sitting on my american flyer), watching Abbott and Costello meet Frankenstein for the tenth time (scared and laughing at the same time), water skiing (me trying to get up on 2 skies, and Don slalom master), fishing off Pop-pop's yacht and the blue fish so thick Don catching them in their sides with just a treble hook, and many more. My last memory of Don was about 10 years ago, and my family and I were riding around the north end, called up Deutz, and he said come over to pop-pop's old house and I thought I remembered where it was. We were a little lost in the woods, and I pulled over a Mattituck city truck, and asked him where Don Seeth lived. He said, "you mean Big Don!" and he took us to the house. Don was very gracious, told us a few Captain Don stories, about the boat he was restoring, and the Robins Island job. We drank some north end wine, told old East Williston stories, and I left thinking how proud Pop-pop would be of the youngest Seeth Captain. The Schaus kids extend the most heart-felt condolences to the Seeth family. Don enriched our lives and he lives on most heartily in our finest childhood memories.

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  2. Paul SeethSeptember 2, 2009 at 4:09 PM

    Jim-

    Have a vivid memory of Don that took place at your house. All 5 of the Schaus and Seeth brothers were playing a game involving poking sticks into a wasp's nest that was in the bushes next to your driveway. Don was about 4 or 5 years old at the time. The game was to poke the nest and then run like hell when they swarmed. We did this several times, but the final poke that completely destroyed the nest was performed by Don. The wasps went ape shit. Don and I took off full steam down Harvard Street towards home. Don was a few feet ahead of me and was wearing shorts with a small hole in the butt. While Don was in full stride I saw a wasp land on his shorts and crawl right into the hole. Don screamed, and picked up speed headed for home. He raced into the house yelling for Jane....."there's a bee in my pants". Jane pulled down his shorts and liberated the bee. But I will never forget seeing that wasp crawl into his shorts !!!

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